The name’s Gaudin, Ulla Gaudin, and I've been dead. Well, technically. After a near-death experience 30 years ago, I decided that being alive was way more interesting than the alternative. Now, I use my borrowed time to help fellow humans navigate the absurdity of existence.

If you're looking for a guru with all the answers, you're in the wrong place. I'm more of a universal detective, helping you uncover the clues to your own life's mysteries. Think of me as the Sherlock Holmes of the soul, minus the deerstalker hat (unless you're into that sort of thing).

Now, you might have noticed on my homepage that I "talk to dead people." Before you start planning a séance, let me clarify: I'm not running a ghostly call center. Sometimes, the departed decide to drop me a line, and I'm simply the messenger. But I'm not in the business of chasing spirits - that's a bit like trying to herd cats, if the cats were invisible and could walk through walls.

What I'm really all about is helping you tune into your own inner radio station - your higher self. Think of it as the wisest, most enlightened version of you that's been patiently waiting for you to pick up the cosmic hotline. I teach people how to access this wellspring of personal wisdom, because let's face it, you've had all the answers all along. You just needed someone to show you how to find the "on" switch.

When I'm not helping people tune into their inner wisdom, I'm channeling my experiences into my memoir, Expired. This isn't your typical light-hearted, self-help journey. Expired delves into the shadows of my past, chronicling the physical abuse that ultimately led to my brush with death. It's a raw, unflinching look at survival, resilience, and the profound insights that can emerge from our most challenging experiences. While the beginning is admittedly dark, it sets the stage for a powerful story of transformation and rebirth.

Beyond the realms of communing with higher selves or penning memoirs, I'm juggling a few other hats - and I'm not talking about the metaphorical kind (though I do have a lovely collection).

First and foremost, I'm the proud mom of two amazing boys. They've taught me more about life, love, and the art of negotiating bedtime than any spiritual guide ever could. This journey through the treacherous waters of parenthood led me to develop strategies for mindful parenting - because, let's face it, sometimes "mindful" is the last thing you feel when stepping on a Lego at 2 AM.

In my other life (because who doesn't need at least two?), I'm a makeup artist with nearly three decades of experience in film and TV. I've painted faces, created characters, and even earned Oscar and Emmy nominations along the way. Turns out, there's a surprising amount of overlap between making people look good (or dead, which is my true specialty) on camera and helping them feel good in their own skin.

When I'm not elbow-deep in prosthetic makeup or philosophical quandaries, you might find me wielding power tools. I have an insatiable appetite for building things, both big and small. From crafting intricate miniature houses (perfect for those tiny existential crises) to renovating my own full-sized home and breathing new life into old furniture, I'm always creating something. It's like meditation but with more sawdust.

Whether you're grappling with life's big questions, trying to decide what to have for dinner, or wondering why you always lose socks in the laundry (spoiler: it's probably not ghosts), your higher self has got the 411. I'm just here to help you dial in the frequency and maybe provide some etheral tech support along the way.